You’re ruining Christmas

I used to go out with an Aussie and he was forever calling me a whinging pom, which was rich as he was the biggest moaner I’ve ever met only he just did it with an inflection at the end of every sentence so that made it OK apparently.

But what’s wrong with having a moan once in a while? Surely its better to get out our gripes than bottle them all up and risk us exploding in dangerous stabby, screamy, government worker kinda way.

So on that note I just have a few things to say

Will retailers stop ruining Christmas.

FFS its still over a month away and you have been ramming turkeys, mince pies and prawn rings down my throat since bloody September. Maybe you have some dodgy calendar that shows December starts after 31st August or you’re just a bunch of sadistic bastards who want to throw the nation into a debt fuelled panic for you’re own amusement.

It’s one day and as much as I love Christmas I’m not spending a penny on it until the 1st December and I think we should all resolve to do the same thing so these jackasses will stop trying to make Christmas last for half the fucking year.

You have pissed me off so much this year that we have actually decided to make most of our gifts this year. Ha didn’t see that one coming you greedy bastards. that’s right you can take your sparkly, cosy, aspirational adverts and stick them up your mass produced arse. I’m out!

 

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