Hardwired parent

This morning I awoke to a high pitched whinging noise, not a surprise you would think having a one year old. The difference being that said one year old wasn’t actually in the house this morning, he is at his his grandma’s on the other side of town.

You know that tweet that says ‘there is nothing greater than the sound of a baby’s laughter, unless it’s 2am and you don’t have a baby’ yeah well waking up to the sound of whining when you don’t have a baby is equally creepy/terrifying.

So I look around me startled expecting to see the monitor going off but it’s not there, of course. I remember Max isn’t there and start questioning my sanity. Have I actually started hearing voices? Then the noise starts again, this time I know exactly where it’s coming from. My stomach.

Yes that’s right even when my child isn’t there my body has taken to mimicking the sounds of my baby because why shouldn’t I want to be woken up at 6:20am with no fucking good reason.

FML (fuck my lie-in)


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