Normal service has now resumed with rants on the daily drudge and today we have a guest rant from the fabulous Mrs B all about the  dreaded school run. Yep I know most of you are nodding already.

The School Run Rant

Yellow Liners – I walk to school (not every day I admit) but I live about twenty minutes away on foot and I’m in a fortunate position that I have time in the morning to enjoy a brisk stroll with my children. I understand there are parents that can’t afford this luxury and need to drive to school so they can then carry on to work but do me a favour, leave the house just ten minutes earlier and find somewhere legal to park.  Who do you think you are, that makes it OK for you to abandon your oversized 4×4 on a double yellow line – MOVE ON!

Playground Politics – I don’t understand playground etiquette – one day I’m surrounded by other mums, all smiling and chatting and involving.  The next day I’m a billy-no-mates – the huddle has moved on and I’m left to stare at my feet while I’m waiting for my children. I come to school to drop my children off, ensure they are safely within the care of the teacher and then leave.  It’s the same at the other end of the day, I arrive, collect the same children and go home. I’m happy to smile and wave and share in the day’s weather news, but I don’t really want to know why you’re not talking to your husband, how many pounds you lost at slimming class this week or how much your mortgage costs.  You wouldn’t choose to be my friend outside of school so please don’t pretend to be my friend so you care over-share personal information with me one day and blank me the next.

Voluntary Contributions – “Dear Parents, we are going to be taking ‘insert name here’ on a fabulous school outing to ‘insert local wartime monument/park/needle museum here’. We are asking ALL parents to provide a ‘voluntary contribution’ towards the trip….please note however that if we don’t get enough money to pay for the trip, we will be unable to take them”.  “Dear school, thank you so much for creating opportunities for my ‘’insert name here’ to expand their learning. Oh and thanks for telling our children about the trip and lifting their hopes before asking us for the ‘voluntary contribution’ towards a trip that if we don’t cough up enough money towards, the children will have to go without.”


3 thoughts on “School

  1. Absolutely. I have to drive in otherwise it’s nearly an hour and a half’s walk twice a day… but I make sure I park somewhere sensible even if it means we have to walk for all of a couple of minutes.
    I have even seen kids been driven in who live within a 5 minute walk – they are the ones who will then park on a corner/junction/the yellow zigzags to get as close to the gate as possible while we park outside their house down the road! I do love it when the police come for the afternoon (as they’ve started to do quite regularly) and see them all whining at the parking ticket that’s been stuck to the window.

  2. This made me laugh out loud. I could of written it myself as it is identical at my daughters school! I have many a rant about voluntary contributions (our trip did get cancelled due to lack of funds!) Another one of my rants is the Christmas play, we have to provide all the costumes, I had to dress my daughter as a chicken last year or as requested ‘dress in yellow’ do you realise how hard it is to find yellow items of clothing in December!!

    Rant over


    • @Jane – or indeed anything they ask for costume wise, such as ‘plain grey long sleeved top’. Yeah, where sells those for kids? Eventually, an adult one is tracked down that costs £9 and with a neckline wide enough to almost be an off the shoulder number but after several hours searching, it’s that or nothing.

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